Mothering Corner

A friend of mine has a 13-year-old daughter who’s beginning to have some acne on her face. She brought her gal for microdermabrasion to clear out the acne but her condition doesn’t improve. Personally, I think pimples and acne are pretty common in teenagers. They should just clean their skin well and only apply acne treatment products which are recommended by certified dermatologists instead of beauticians. I agree that microdermabrasion does help in treating acne, but I won’t recommend her to start it so early as she will still have acne due to hormonal change.

I’m aware that some teenagers will suffer from lack of self esteem if they have acne problems. But there are ways of talking to a teenagers about acne, and parents play a integral role in this. If you teenager really wants to go for microdermabrasion, just remember that it’s not advisable for her to be exposed to the sun. But judging from our local schools condition, it’s not easy to be out from the sun, isn’t it?

Most of us will only want the best for our kids. Same as other parents, I’m not hoping that my kids will be top in their academic or excel in being superkids, I just want them to be healthy and happy. But sometimes, we can’t just give them total freedom when they are approaching their teens. It’s hard to control their circle of friends, but we can try our best to be their best friends and know about their lives and whereabout.

I know someone whose son passed away due to drug addiction. He was a brilliant young man but he got into some bad influence and got himself addicted to drugs. His mother was in denial and refused to send the only son for help. Maybe during those years, our local rehab was not as well equipped as comparing to now, so she was reluctant. Thus, he didn’t make it when he was overdose with drugs.

If you have a teenager whom you suspect that he’s abusing drugs, get him the proper treatment as soon as possible. A drug treatment in Malibu might be a good option if you are looking for a rehab with private and exclusive environment. As long as the help is given as early as possible, there is always a chance of recovery.

I got to know some mothers with teens lately, especially from the handicraft shop where I get from yarns from. They will be talking about their kids, and sometimes, I learn something valuable from them. Mothers are always worried about their kids, not matter how old the kids are. But when they are in their teens, parenting may be even more challenging because some of the teens can be very rebellious and they listen more to their friends as comparing to their parents.

I’ve been through my rebellious stage as well. No, I didn’t go for drug abuse, teen sex, criminal cases or anything bad, mind you! But I didn’t like to be controlled and asked too many questions by my parents. I preferred them to leave me alone and let me have my own ways. I was so naive to think that I was old enough to judge everything, even if I was only 16 years old! LOL!

So, I wonder if my kids will give me the same headache after years later. That will be another stage of parenthood.

I have 2 young kids, but I have been through a rebellious teenage years, so I will be expecting some headache from them, if they have my traits.

But I can’t stop them from growing up and have their own views. If I’m against them, instead of being their friends, they will be drifting away from us, and draw more to their peers. If the friends are good, then we should not have much to worry about. But if they are from the bad influence type, we might have some trouble with our teens then.

Just imagine, drugs, skip school, leisure sex (yikes!), smoking, and etc. By just imagining all these already gives goosebumps to me, so I better have great communication with my kids and build the trust with them in their teenage years so that they are more willing to tell me about themselves, then hiding away.

However, there is help for troubled teens. Even if you teens are in trouble, that doesn’t mean we should give up on them. If advising and talking are not good enough, get professional counseling. Just call up the number, and find out more about Troubled Teen Options.

Nonetheless, this one is a bit hard for most parents.

Get police involved, possible foster care or state placement. This option often places the child with harder, more experienced adolescents in the area.

I can’t imagine have my kids up to this extend. No parent wants to face this, but when it is really necessary. I got to admit that this is too challenging for me.

Hubby has a cousin who passed away due to excessive drug abuse. He was a good boy but he had some bad influence from his peers when he was in high school. His school results deteriorated a lot, and his behaviors changed significantly too.

It’s not hard to identify that he’s on drugs as the physical symptoms were obvious. He was losing weight, had poor coordination, tired most of the time with bloodshot or watery eyes and had shaky hands. But his mom didn’t send him to drug rehab. She was in denial stage and was hoping that he would be alright by himself. He’s the only son she had, so as typical tradisional Chinese, she loved him the most.

The thing is, our rehab center here is not as exclusive as the ones in US. See what I mean?

Where can we find one as exclusive as this here? You tell me!

With a rehab as exclusive and highly facilitated like The Watershed Addiction Treatment Programs, I think most men or women suffering from alcoholism or drug addiction will be gladly be admitted.

But well, most importantly, the addict himself has to realize that he has a problem, and willing to get help, instead of living in denial. Hubby’s cousin didn’t make it to recovery, In fact, he killed himself with over dosage of drugs. It’s pretty sad to see how drugs destroyed his life, and his family will never be the same again.