Mothering Corner

Mornings can be rather stressful when I have to put breakfast on the table, get the kids ready for school and prepare their school bags. Hubby helps a lot but not with my gal. My gal has always been a mommy’s girl since she was a baby. She is going through a learning state when she wants to do everything by herself. Even if she can’t button her uniform, she still insists on trying so.

At first, we were struggling with her to help her out so that we won’t be late to school, but now, I let her have her own way. She is given time to help herself with bathing and dressing, while the rest of us get ourselves ready and take breakfast without her. LOL! When she finally asks for help, then only I will attend to her. It’s much easier for everyone and we don’t end up with a grumpy kid early in the morning.

She’s going through self-caring now, and frankly, I’m happy with her achievement. Of course, there are times when she’s driving me up the wall, but I keep telling myself that kids go through this state. If she wants the pens, just give them to her instead of taking them away. If she wants to try her way out, let her be. As long as she’s not hurting herself, she will have the space and time to try things out.

Dealing with defiance can be tricky and we need to be more patience. If you are interested to know more about self-caring and defiance, check out the articles at Baby Center. I think they are quite useful.

Previously, some people I know doubted about our decision of sending our kids to a Thai preschool, so I wrote a lengthy post about it. I understand that some parents are concerned about how much their children will learn academic wise, and that’s why more and more kindergartens are giving a lot of homework in preparing the children for primary schools.

If I’m still staying in Malaysia and have plan to send my kids to Chinese primary schools, maybe I will be stressing as much about their education too. It’s not easy to “survive” in a Chinese school without tuition, extra classes, lots of homework and etc, unless your kid is brilliant. But I’m glad that my children have another chance to learn in another environment now, so they don’t have to go through those stressful moments until much older. Most schools in Thailand still practice learn through play, and the homework is not as much as those given locally.

I check my kid’s homework everyday, and he doesn’t have to repeat the same letter or number for more than 5 times, but there are extra sheets of revising the letter or number he learns on that day. It’s much easier for him to finish his work and he enjoys school more. As for my little toddler, she doesn’t have homework. She tells me that she plays all day long.

I won’t know if our decision is right until our kids are older. But I’m sure about this, they are happy and eager to go to school. Maybe that will trigger their hunger for knowledge too huh?

I try hard not to spank my kids, but I did hit their hands when they were really naughty before, but I told myself not to do so just because I am angry with their behavior but only do so to teach them a lesson about danger or circumstances. Most of the time, my kids are doing fine, so we don’t have to piak them much. Besides that, I don’t really agree with hitting kids because they are very vulnerable.

I’ve recently known a little girl who has finger marks and bruises on her arms and legs. SIL told me that her mother hits her often, and she hits her hard. I can’t imagine what have the girl done to be beaten up, but I know that her family is having a serious financial crisis now and her parents are constantly fighting at home. This little girl seems to be very afraid of being herself. She played with my kids once, but since then, she was not allowed to play with them even if she wants to. I can’t speak Thai, so I can’t talk much to her mother.

It’s their family affair and I can’t interfere. But if the mother is doing so because of her own anger, I don’t think it’s the right way of parenting.

Before we moved here, my hubby is pretty much traveling around and my kids are attached to him as playmates. They would come to me at bed time or when they were seeking for comfort. But after a month of having a full time daddy around, my kids are getting more attached to daddy.

I have to cook and do some house chores at home so my kids are spending more time with daddy aka nanny. It’s good that hubby can help me out with the kids, if not I really can’t do much at home. At office hour, we take turn to attend to our kids and keep them away from trouble. We had some arguments over our kids sometimes, but now we will try not to be angry at them. My kids are just trying to be kids, so we can’t expect much from them. As long as we manage to get our things done, no matter where and where and how, we will call it a good day.

So, maybe I should give hubby one of those men’s jewelry as a token of appreciation someday huh?

I hate forcing my kids to school but in our current condition, it’s best to send them to school other than spending time at the office with us. Both hubby and I have to take turn to attend to them and our work is badly affected sometimes. Maybe we need to get a new software for tasks and getting things done, but none in this world will help us in parenting and dealing with our kids’ needs!

So, we have decided to send them to a nearby preschool in 2 months. They might not be able to speak Thai yet, but maybe they will learn faster at school by interacting with other children. Besides that, we have to concentrate more on our work and try to make a living here.

Nonetheless, we are trying to do the best for our children. Once we get home, we have to do our best in giving them the most attention and quality time. Like most working parents, it’s not easy to do so but we will do our best.

One of a child I know almost had an accident last night. She was running with a pencil in her hand but she tripped and fell to the floor. Her naturally reflex was to support her body with her hands, but she almost puked the pencil into her eye. Gosh, it was a scary sight and her parents were so shocked to see that.

I keep telling my kids not to run around with a sharp object in their hands, even if it’s one of those round pointed promotional pens. It’s best to be safe than sorry. I remembered that that was a news about a girl accidentally killed herself when she tripped with a chopstick in her hand. So, anything can happen in just a split of second.

I hate food bribery, but by all means, it works sometimes. My kids are feeding on junks more than usual since the day we started bring them to work. Like most children, they can easily get bored with the little office space and will surely mess things around. Thus, everyone likes to feed them food so that they can be quiet for a while.

I know that I should offer them healthy snacks, but they have long been corrupted won’t take it. So, it’s best to keep them busy instead of offering them more junks which are totally useless.

Another thing is, their grandparents like to offer them food so that they will behave as well. Food bribery is getting harder if it’s done by older generation as I don’t have any control about that. Gosh….I think I just have to find a balance point when it comes to food bribery. As long as they eat well at normal meal times, I better stop being so paranoid about it.

When my kids are babies, it’s so easy to feed them. They would just eat anything I prepared and they hardly split out the food or run away from the table. Wait a minute, they were babies, they couldn’t run nor walk yet! LOL!

But now, meal times can be pretty challenging. Like most kids, they don’t like all types of vegetables, so it’s trial and error to me when I cook for them. Broccoli is their best choice, but I prefer to add more variety instead of feeding one type of veggie.

Thus, one of my ways of introducing the vegetables is by preparing vegetable soups. Like most Chinese, we believe that soups are great for health as most of the nutrients are dissolved in the water in boiling process. The veggie or meat might be tasteless when the soup is ready if you boil it for long hours, so if you want to keep the veggie crunchy and fresh, don’t boil it for too long. My kids love to take the soup too, so even if they don’t take the veggie occasionally, I’m not too worried about it. They take fruits everyday and fruits are a good source of fiber and other nutrients.

Some Celery and corn from my vegetable soup

If possible, steamed veggie is the best to ensure that most of the nutrients are not lost. For a busy mother like me, I would just place a bowl of broccoli, cube potatoes and carrots on the top shelve of the rice cooker when I’m cooking the rice. By the time the rice is ready, the veggies are well steamed too. Pretty simple huh?

My kids travel a lot with us, and my little girl started flying when she was 4 months old. It was easier traveling with a young baby since she slept most of the time and I didn’t have to pack a lot because she was breastfed exclusively. It was a bliss flying with her until she turned 1 and a half. During her first trip to Bangkok, she made a big fuss on the plane when we were flying back. I know that lots of passengers were pretty annoyed by the 2 hours flight with a crying and fussy toddler, but I couldn’t do much. She just didn’t want to settle down even if she was really sleepy.

But for our recent flight, she behaved well. We brought along some color pencils and books for her and she did some scribbling. Besides that, she brought along her doll and she played with her for a while.

She cried for milk but after that she took a nap. Thus, my 2 year old did well on the plane and I was so proud of her. I guess we just need to prepare well for our journey then. We will be flying more often for the next 6 months.

My hubby and I are quite different in our ways of watching over the kids. I’m the more protective one and he’s the one who gives more freedom to the kids. That’s why my kids prefer to go shopping with their daddy now because he’s not as paranoid as me.

Nonetheless, I still have fear of losing my kids in shopping malls or crowded places since they don’t always hold our hands at all time. I wanted to get the kid safety harness previously, but I got lots of protest from people around me who thought that it’s weird to do so in public as we hardly see parents using the safety harness here.

Thus, I’m glad another option to keep my kids located within a short distance. It’s the “Mommy I’m Here” Child Locator, and maybe it helps?

Has anyone used it? I am thinking of getting the locators, if hubby agrees with me.