Mothering Corner

Most of us are very shy when it comes to talking about sex as Asians are generally more conservative. I remembered well what my ob-gynae told me during my second pregnancy when he politely asked me not to get intimate with my hubby. I almost laughed out loud as he didn’t mention the word sex, but used words like “Daddy, you have to hold yourself and don’t get intimate with your wife.” Don’t you think it’s easier if he just mentioned sex is not allowed?

I had placenta preavia during second pregnancy and after a series of spotting and bleeding, bed rest was needed to secure my baby. But for any healthy expectant mother, sex during pregnancy is allowed. Maybe we don’t even want to think about it during the first trimester of EARLY PREGNANCY when morning sickness and tiredness are so common, but it can be enjoyable once you are feeling good about the changes in your body. Nonetheless, if you have any of the following conditions, it’s best to avoid sex at certain stage of pregnancy.

When should sex be avoided in pregnancy?
If you have a tendency to miscarry, it may be wise to abstain from sex until you are passed 12 weeks.
If you have a history of pre-term labour, or are experiencing signs of early labour it may be suggested that you avoid sex in the last trimester.
If you have a low-lying placenta or placenta preavia, avoid sex in the last trimester.
If you experience any vaginal bleeding, stop having sex and see your doctor or midwife as soon as possible.

Talk to your doctor if you have any doubts. He is the best person to give you more information about how to maintain a healthy pregnancy.

This post is brought to you by http://www.gurgle.com/subjects/Early_Pregnancy/default.aspx.

A friend of mine was diagnosed with first stage cancer last year even if she’s only about my age. If it’s not because of her Healthcare Coverage, her family might have financial problems right now as her medical and surgery expenses were rather costly.

In my opinion, getting a insurance coverage is very important, especially to parents with little children. What would have happened to your kids if you can’t provide for them financially anymore? It’s one of the greatest fears I have as a mother, that’s why I always make sure that my insurance premium is paid on time. There are lots of different types of health insurance plans available in the market, and some Major Medical Family Plans might even help you to Save Money on Insurance as comparing to buying individual coverage.

My kids have their insurance coverage too, but it’s more for hospitalization and investment. As for life insurance, I would rather spend it on me and hubby.

Hubby has been asking me to stop making money from my blogs since it’s not making a lot. I used to spend lots of time blogging until late at night, but I stopped doing so for the past few months. Getting a PR 0 doesn’t sound to bad to me as I have more personal time for the kids and hubby, besides getting more of my precious sleep!

Nonetheless, I still have the intention of making money for myself. Maybe investing in stock options is another way of making money, even if it takes longer time to see a profit. However, I can ask for FIL’s advice if I’m serious about this. He’s been investing all his life, so he has lots of insights and experience in investing.

But I won’t start with my own money until I’m confident enough in investing. I guess hubby is going to faint if I’m telling him about my intention in investment.

I bought some bras again a few days ago and once I reached home, I threw away all my nursing bras. I still wore them after weaning because they were comfortable. But I think it’s time to throw all of them away and get myself more pretty bras that I used to have. Besides that, our breast size changes during pregnancy and breastfeeding, it’s quite hard to have the same size if I’m going to be a moo again.

Frankly, don’t you miss those pretty bras when you are wearing only nursing bras? I did. And I regretted that I didn’t keep any of my old bras behind once I became a breastfeeding mother. But then again, I can’t fit in my old bra size. LOL!

Hubby has just got his medical report and he has to watch out his iron level. I haven’t done mine for years and I know that my results won’t be too good either. I admit that I have been avoiding my checkup for as long as it can be, and it’s not going to do me any good. Gosh, I haven’t done my pap smear too! With sleep deprivation for the past few months, my health was deteriorating. But I try to get at least 6 hours of sleep now and I stopped blogging until late at night. Even if I have individual health insurance, I certainly do not wish to use it for the time being.

I’ve started exercising regular this month and hopefully I will be fitter in a few months. After that, I better make an appointment with wellness lab and get my medical report done.

A year ago, I would be shopping for nursing tops for Chinese New Year by now. I visit most of our close relatives during the first few days of Chinese New Year and not everyone is comfortable with the idea of me breastfeeding my gal in the gathering. Thus, I tried my best to nurse my baby in discreet, unless the host offered me a room.

If you are a breastfeeding mother and if you have worries about breastfeeding in public like I did previously, check out those nice nursing tops from mothersenvogue.com. They offer a lot of pretty and trendy nursing clothes, and I used to buy a lot from their website. Just take a look at this nursing top…

Once you get used to breastfeeding in nursing tops, you can practically breastfeed everything. You don’t need to get back to the car and cover it with car cover to nurse your baby in it. You just need more practice and breastfeeding in discreet will come like a bliss.

I overheard the news about Sharlinie Mohd Nashar being abducted over the radio on Friday.

Five-year-old Sharlinie Mohd Nashar has gone missing nearby her house in Taman Dato Harun, in Petaling Jaya since Wednesday. The public is urged to help find her.

I didn’t read the newspapers that morning and when I heard the news, I was worried about her. It’s not the first case in the country and after the murder of a girl previously, I guess the public is more keen to help out this time. We can be ignorant and selfishly think that it has nothing to do with us. It has! It’s a life of a child. So if you have any information, call the Petaling Jaya police headquarters at 03-7966 2222 or Chong at 016-603 6633.  

My boy is doing well at school now. It was very stressful for me on the first day, but I’m glad that things turned out to be fine. The teacher asked if he would like to join the tuition class but I didn’t enroll him. I don’t see the point of sending him for tuition yet, and I just want him to have fun mixing around but not so much about academic.

I know that lots of kids at his age have started joining extra classes, but for my boy, he only attends Kindermusik, and that’s it. I have been working in the “extra classes” line for a few years and I am fully aware of the pros and cons. I can just “train” my own kids with those right and left brains methods, but I prefer not to. I just want my kids to be healthy and growing up being themselves. If they have the potential and interests in certain aspect, I don’t mind nurturing them, but only if my kids are enjoying it. I’ve seen parents pushing kids to the extreme until they are numb with their busy schedule, and that’s not what I want for my kids.

Frankly, I don’t think a person’s life has to end up with careers like doctors or lawyers to be classified as successful. Even if my kids end up with business in wholesale flowers or anything else, as long as they have tried their best and happy about it, I will be fully supportive. I was very kiasu before I became a mother. The reason why I picked up those mind mapping or memory skills was to apply them on my kids, and that was what I thought. But now, I would rather leave the methods behind and let my kids grow up “normally”. LOL! They don’t have to be little Einsteins for their parents.

Frankly, I don’t feel like having another baby soon. It’s a lot of work and sleepless nights involved, and I’m not ready for this. My SIL has just become a mother last week, and she’s trying her best to breastfeed her newborn baby. She has a cesarean but she’s doing well now. She has only her sister to help her with the cooking, thus it’s a lot of hard work for her. It’s just like me. When I had my babies, I had only MIL to cook for me and later my maid helped me with my first child. It’s really tiring and at one point, I thought my days were passed with breastfeeding, burping, cleaning up poo poo (my babies poo after feeding!), lying down for a while and start the whole process all over again.

Let’s admit it, taking care of a newborn baby all by ourselves is very tiring, but it’s rewarding by the end of the day. Being able to be there for the first smile, first turn, first coo and everything else make my mothering moments more worthwhile than diamond rings. It’s not easy, but most of us have been through it rather well.

Nonetheless, I hope that SIL is able to get more sleep. Sleep was what I missed the most during the early days!

Hubby asked me to think of a home business which I’m interested in running once we have settled down somewhere from here. I have been thinking a lot lately, but I can’t make up my mind. I love blogging, and if I have to take care of the kids and manage the chores all by myself, the time I have for blogging and knitting will be minimum. I don’t think I can run any home business even if I want to.

Setting up a business is not hard, you just need to have the right documents, the products, the small business phone systems and some beginner’s luck to kick start everything. But running a business in long run seriously takes a lot of effort and time. Most businesses die in the first year, so it’s crucial to make things happen in the first few months. I don’t think I have the determination for that. I would rather focus on my kids now. Starting all over again in a foreign country is not going to be easy for them and they need me.

Gee…I really hope that we can make it as a family.