Mothering Corner

I met a friend who’s pregnant and due by the end of March for lunch today. She’s surprised to see how quickly I lost my baby fat away, and be back to myself in 9 months. She asked was it yoga that made me lose all my weight, but it’s not. I told her it’s breastfeeding because Isabelle’s sucking all my fat away! LOL!

She asked me some questions about breastfeeding, and raised her concerns like “not enough milk” (I’ll write about this!), what to prepared, how frequent baby feeds, and etc. So, it’s a good chance for me to promote breastfeeding. But I’ve forgotten to ask if she’s bought a breast pump!!!

Breast pump is essential to breastfeeding, but some mothers prefer to express by hand. I have 3 sets of breast pumps. I used Avent ISIS when I was breastfeeding Justin, and it’s a manual pump. In my opinion, it’s very convenient as I could just pump anywhere, such as in the toilet (yes, I did that), storeroom, nursing room, or even in the car! I didn’t have to look for socket or batteries to operate the pump, and it’s not making lots of noises too. The surplus is, it promotes better let down and I got more milk with it than hand expressing.

However, the disadvantage of this pump is that I needed to press on it manually, and it’s really troublesome and tiring when I nurse and pump at the same time. Bear in mind that you’ll get more milk by nursing on one side and pumping on the other side simultaneously! I’ll share my experience on this next time.

Since the pump was yellowish after prolong sterilizing, I bought a new set of Avent ISIS when I was pregnant with Isabelle. During my third trimester, I went shopping for baby stuffs and came across Medela Mini Electric Pump. I’d never used an electrical pump, and wanted to try it out.

I got my milk will come out easier with the pump, but surprisingly, it’s not. I had to trial and error with the pressure setting to control the suction of the pump to induce better let down. After some time, I got used to it, and it became very convenient when I pumping and nursing at the same time. However, I tend to get lesser milk with Medela, as comparing to Avent. I’m not sure what the reason, or it’s probably happened to me only.

No matter what pump you buy, I’d advise you to learn how to do hand expressing too. You can get some pictures from breastfeeding.com to understand better on how it’s done.

I learned this from Mdm Tham, who preferred hand expressing that using the pump. Luckily I picked up this skill as I forgot to bring my pump along when I was back to my mum’s place and needed to pump some milk for storage. BTW, hand expressing is also convenient when I needed to release some milk from engorged breasts onto breast pads and disposed them, before nursing my newborn babies who had a hard time taking in engorged breasts with stronger let down.

Nonetheless, if you have any better breast pump you’d like to recommend, please drop a comment here.

If you started breastfeeding well with proper latch on, breastfeeding is not painful at all. But most mommies went through a period of hardship in breastfeeding, especially during the early weeks. Crack nipples is one of the problem I faced.

Justin latched on very well, and I managed to breastfeed him fully with my colostrum for the first 3 days. During to engorgement, not on the breasts were enlarged (and looked like I had my implants in them!!!), my nipples were enlarged too. Thus, Justin was having a problem taking in the areola with his mouth. He was latching on mainly on my nipples, and after some sucking, I had some minor cracks and it’s extremely painful! Everyone he open his mouth and sucked for the first time, I could just scream and push him away. But I didn’t do that and kept biting on my lips to hang on to the pain. It’s really unbearable!

Luckily, I had a home visit my Mdm Tham on the 4th day, and when she saw how engorged I was, she taught me how to hand massage my breasts to soften the lumps and milk ducts (especially under the armpits) and how to do hand express. She advised me to express out some milk to make the breasts less engorged and also taught how to differentiate engorged, full, and normal breasts.

• Engorged: Hard and sometimes painful. If nipples are larger than usual, newborn babies may have latch on problem, even if they latch on well initially.
• Full: Breasts are harder than usual, but not comfortable at all.
• Normal: Just as soft as they are before you’re pregnant. Soft doesn’t mean no milk, as it’s more on mental to stimulate milk production.

So, I had to make sure that I’m not too engorged for Justin to latch on. The flow would be too strong for him too. Thus, I’d express a bit before nursing him.

As for my crack nipples, I used Palmer’s nursing cream on them, and air my breasts as much as possible. Normally, it’s contradict to Chinese confinement rules as they believe that mothers in confinement should cover from head to toes to avoid “the wind from getting in”. But I was topless most of the time to air my nipples to aid the healing process. I found that it’s best to just apply breastmilk on the nipples after every feed to prevent them from cracking.

But when it’s Isabelle’s turn, I didn’t have this problem at all!

I love to have let down, and hate it as well. This is what I quoted from http://familydoctor.org/019.xml:

What is the let-down reflex?

A few seconds to several minutes after you start breastfeeding, you may feel a tingle in your breast, and milk may start to drip from the breast not being used. These are signs that your milk has “let-down.” This means your milk is ready to flow.

This let-down reflex makes breast feeding easier for your baby. Let-down may also occur if a feeding is overdue, if you hear your baby cry or even if you think about your baby.

Let-down can be forceful enough to cause your baby to cough. If this is a problem, you can express some of your milk by hand before a feeding to bring on the let-down reflex before you start breastfeeding.

I’ve always had strong and powerful let down, you know, the spraying type? During my early breastfeeding days with Justin, I was very engorged all the time as I pumped and nursed for every feed and over-stimulated my production. And thus, I’d just have let down whenever the breasts were full. Once, after shower, when I was about to dress up, I got a let down and had milk spraying into my closet! It’s so hilarious!

Having over-active let down made my breastfeeding days more difficult when both my babies were younger. They just couldn’t cope with the milk and choked while nursing. Sometimes, they’re too angry with the let down, they’d detach, turned away, arched their body backward, screamed in anger, and refused to nurse! I needed to comfort them down to convince them to nurse again. Of coz, sometimes, I’d pump out a bit until the let down was over, then only nurse my babies. This would help a lot, but it’s a lot of work, especially at night when sleep is so precious to sleep deprived moms like me!

But if I’m expressing, I’d LOVE to have let down, and would hope to have more than one too! During let down, the milk will come out faster and if coordinate well with pumping, I could easily get 4 oz per breast in less than 10 minutes. During my glory days, I could get 10 oz from both sides with 4 hours of pumping interval. But I seldom pump now after being a SAHM, and I prefer to nurse directly than pumping.

Nonetheless, if you need a let down desperately, try to relax after a warm drink. Look at your kids photo, or imagine your baby’s smile, then try pumping again. If still can’t get let down, just stop and try again later. Let down comes easier when a moo is more relax.

Lots of first time mums who wanted to breastfeed in the first place, but failed because of crack nipples, painful breastfeeding experience, baby couldn’t get enough milk, and etc, most of them time, it’s due to poor latching on.

Getting a good latch on needs some practice, but if you do it right the very first time, it comes naturally for both baby and you. And remember that, breastfeeding is not painful! If you’re feeling some discomfort or pain, detach the baby’s mouth by inserting your pinky into her mouth from the side to let go of her suction first. Then, baby will naturally open her mouth and release your breast. Never, never, and never pull your nipples out! (Ouch!) That hurts a lot!

No matter what’s the position you’re breastfeeding in, you have to make yourself COMFORTABLE first. As I may recommend lying down position, but some mothers prefer to breastfeed sitting up. So, as long as you’re feeling comfortable with whatever position you’re breastfeeding in, it’s up to you to decide.

Please make sure that you’re not straining your back, don’t hunch, your episiotomy or c-sec wound’s not hurt, or your arms are tired. Mommies have to be feeling good first before you breastfeed as baby can sense your tense and be cranky too.

Then, align baby’s NOSE to your nipple, and make sure that baby’s mouth is widely open, then bring BABY towards the breast and make sure that baby takes in the areola but not only the nipple. It’s breastfeeding, not nipple feeding. So, make sure baby’s mouth fully covers the areola to prevent nipple crack which is very painful.

Make sure you’re sitting well, with your back straight and supported with pillow if necessary, and your feet are nicely placed on the ground or a small stool. Always ensure that baby’s head and body are aligned, which means baby’s not turning her head. And baby’s tummy will be touching your tummy too, and I liked to do this without clothing during confinement to ensure the skin to skin contact.

Let baby suckle until she’s full and detach by herself, or she falls asleep and you’ll have to detach by using the method I mentioned above. A full newborn baby will normally sleep after a feed, or pee or poo!

I’m writing this from my experience, without referring to books, so if I missed out anything, please feel free to let me know. Thanks!

P/S: If you’d like to look at how it’s done, you can refer here.

Since I was very kiasu if I failed in breastfeeding Justin, I chose to deliver at baby-friendly initiated hospital. There’s only one in Ipoh, and that is Ipoh Specialist Hospital. Before I was about to pop, I joined their antenatal class, and there’s a session about breastfeeding conducted by their ex-lactation consultant, Mdm Tham. She’s a nice lady who’s very determined in helping mothers to breastfeed exclusively, and she helped me a lot during the initial days.

Why I chose a BFIH in the first place? The nurses are trained in breastfeeding, and they practise rooming in with baby. All general hospital are BFIH, and there are only a few private hospitals are.

Well, to succeed in breastfeeding, a newborn baby is best to be placed on the mother’s breast within an hour he’s born. I can still remember how amazing I was seeing Justin and Isabelle for the first time, and how they learnt to suckled.

Justin wasn’t hungry when he’s born, and he’s more curious about his surrounding. Even if I tried to latch him on lying down, he’s not interested. So, the nurse took him away for a bath first, before handling him to me again. Then only he’s interested to nurse. The nurse helped me to latch him on, and I was still lying down. It’s best to learn how to breastfeed lying down as mother can take some rest too.

But for Isabelle, she’s crying for milk shortly after she’s born. I nursed her while being wheeled from the delivering room to my ward! Of coz, I was nursing her lying down, and being a moo the second time around, I was a pro! So, I don’t need any help.

In BFIH, babies are normally handled to the mothers who want to breastfeed as soon as possible. And mothers don’t have to walk to the nursery as they practice rooming in with babies. Justin and Isabelle were with me all the time, except after midnight till 6am, as the nurses advised me to take some rest, but they still brought my babies to me for breastfeeding as I opt to do it exclusively, which means not supplementing with cow milk.

And at BFIH, they don’t permit bottles and pacifier to avoid nipple confusion in newborn babies. If you can’t breastfeed as some mommies are very tired after a cesarean, the nurses will cup feed the baby. So, if you are keen to breastfeeding but still need some help in the first few days, try to cup feed the baby by using Medela feeding cups. They’re quite cheap, it’s about RM2.50 - RM3.00 per cup. Yes, newborn babies can drink from a cup! My MIL was also shocked to see Justin drinking from a cup when she’s feeding him while I was having my massage at my 3th week of confinement.

The best thing is, you can get home visit from experienced nurses after you are discharged from the hospital. Why? It’s because you don’t have milk for the first few days, as it’s only colostrum. To those mothers who’re pumping and got nothing for the first few days, and being frustrated that you don’t have milk, it’s really not milk, as colostrum is thicker than milk and it’s more on quality but not quantity. So, you’ll get only a little if you pump, and you’ll feel like giving up.

When the milk comes after 3, 5, or maybe 7 days, you’ll probably be suffering from engorgement if you’re not nursing enough, or the demand supply is not equalized yet. So, home visit is very helpful this time. Mdm Tham taught me how to massage my breasts to soften the lumps, as I was badly engorged (and it’s extremely painful!!!) and the milk just won’t come out even if I use my Avent pump or nurse directly. So, if you need more help, just get from the nurses. Some nurses from Klinik Kesihatan visit new mothers who have just deliver too, I had this service with Isabelle. But I didn’t have much to ask about breastfeeding already!

None of hubby’s family members breastfeed, and my mom only breastfed me for 6 months, but not exclusively. When I was pregnant and told my friends and relatives that I would like to breastfeed Justin exclusively, I got lots of negative comments from them, including my mum! Here goes:

1. Chinese don’t have milk, only Malays have. (Sorry for being bias)
2. Sure no milk one because they failed already
3. Very tiring, confinement is for mothers to rest and sleep
4. Breastmilk not filling enough, need to supplement with formula, if not baby will go hungry
5. My breasts will be out of shape, smaller, slagging, in short, UGLY!
6. Nipples will crack
7. Only people with no money breastfeed (sorry, bias again)
8. Did I leave out anything?…
   

There’re too many negative comments, but I mentally filtered them out, so I can’t remember much. But knowing that I’ll be learning this all by myself, I got to get myself equiped.

This is how I prepared:

• Buy books and magazine on breastfeeding. Don’t just read from ang mo’s point of view, get some input from Asians too.
• Join local breastfeeding forum, MMB is a very good one to meet up with breastfeeding moms.
• Search the net, there’re lots of breastfeeding website to read on. And after reading up, I know better on the problems I’m going to face, so I was better prepared.
• Listen only to mothers who breastfeed more than a year because they’ve gone through a few stages of breastfeeding and the advice given is more reliable.
• Stay away from those who gives me negative comments, which meant I didn’t talk about breastfeeding anymore with them, but only other topics to keep my spirit up.
• Educate hubby, I’ll ask him to read up some info, and if he didn’t have time for it, I’ll tell him about it.
• Get back up. My back up team consisted of … one member…HUBBY!!! I told him to keep reminding me that I want to breastfeed, and never, never, never give up, buy formula, give bottle, give pacifier… during confinement. If I almost gave up, he couldn’t!
• Educate the people you’re staying with during confinement. I purposely get chinese materials on breastfeeding and asked MIL to read, when she had the time. I also talked to her about the goodness of breastfeeding, and what’s true and what’s not.
• If you can do it, don’t get a confinement lady. Not all confinement ladies support breastfeeding. In fact, most of them hate it as breastfed newborns pee and poo a lot, so more work for them.
• But if you need confinement lady, be firm with your determination to breastfeed.
• Watch out for baby blues or post natal depression. It’s really hard at first, not only with breastfeeding, but with taking care of a newborn. So, if you really feel that you couldn’t take it anymore, GET HELP. Talk to someone, hubby, friends, relatives…Remember, a happy mum is more capable of taking care of baby and yourself. I got the blues too, and really felt like crying when I was having breastfeeding problems with Justin, so I understand how it feels like.
• I’ve always reminded myself, my baby is mine, so I have the right to decide what I want for him or her. That’s how I filtered out the negative comments and can’t remember much now!

If you know me in real person, you know how passionate or fanatic I am about breastfeeding. LOL!

I could go on and on talking about the goodness of breastfeeding like I’m a pro, which I am but without the cert!

I didn’t plan to breastfeed my babies in the first place, as everyone around me feeds their babies with formula milk, and I thought that’s the ONLY food babies get. And I had this mentality last time that only Malays breastfeed because….err….they can’t afford to buy formula milk. OK, shoot me! I was guilty as charged as that was being implanted in my mind by people around me.

When I was pregnant with Justin, I only read a lot about pregnancy and baby care, and I just don’t care much about breastfeeding. However, when I came across Mix.FM during breastfeeding week (every August) and overheard Lilian’s conversation with Jasmeen and Richard and that made me decided on the spot that….I WANNA BREASTFEED!!!

Coincidently, lots of breastfeeding articles came out in Nan Yang Daily, and I read about how Twinsmom, working and traveling mom, and other great mothers’ experiences in breastfeeding. Most of them didn’t sound blissful in the beginning, but they didn’t give up. That’s why I succeeded in breastfeeding both my kids because I always reminded myself, if these great mothers can do it, why can’t I? We humans are mammals, and out of 4000 over species of mammals, we’re the only one thinks we don’t have milk and feeds on other animals’ milk. Doesn’t this sound ridiculous? I apologize if my statement offended you, but that’s how I keep myself motivated and focus.

My breastfeeding journey is not as easy as I thought in the first place, and I’ll share with you in this blog. Stay tune and link my blog to know more. Thanks.

I’ve just got this domain today, and I’m not hosting it with WP as I’m not good at it at all. I was having lots of problems with Shopping Mum and Kids using WP, and I’m not gonna go through that process again.

I like blogspot as it’s easier to use, and so much easier to customize the templates. So, I’ll be busy working on this blog for a few days!

This blog is dedicated to my breastfeeding experience, my mothering moments, and all sort of things about women. So, stay tune and see how I squeeze my brain writing for my 4th blog!

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